Well we did it. It wasn't always pretty and in fact, sometimes it was down right ugly but we survived the summer. The three kids and I had a lot of fun. It seemed to go by so quickly, yet the days were long. We tried out the new splash pad at the Twin Hickory park. We went to CMOR many times. We swam in the backyard pool. We tried story time twice! We even went to the big pool once when my mom and sister were visiting. We made crafts and art and lots of tasty treats. Emma took swimming lessons. The boys played at the gym with other kids and I got to take a class or two.
We never did get to Maymont or to Lewis Ginter or to Stony Point. There just wasn't time. We had just as much fun in the backyard to be honest.
Now that I've covered what we did and did not do, let me let you in on the dirty secrets. Emma and I spent the better part of the summer in a sort of WWE Cage Match. Every single day was a showdown. Was Emma going to listen and behave? Was Mommy going to lose her mind and her cool? Many, many days I failed as a parent. I was bested by a 4 year old. I acted like a child. Throwing tantrums and yelling like a mad woman because Emma knows just what buttons to push to send me over the edge. And she pushes them just as her brothers are having a melt down. Every night I pray to God that he will give me strength and help me be a better mom to Emma. The other night God spoke to me in a way that I could finally here the message. He told me that my attitude and behavior is being picked up by my children and that unless I wanted my kids to remember their childhood mommy as a screamer and scary, then I need to change. Not the four year old or the almost two year olds, ME. I hear you Lord. I hear you loud and clear. I have already failed today but tomorrow is a new day. And I want to be the mom that my kids need me to be.
